Wenx’ World: Panic

27 Dec

‘Submit’. The word was sneakily hidden in a few sentences from my professor recently when discussing PhD scholarship extension. And it was not hidden in a ‘loads of time until you submit’ kinda way, but in a ‘you might be out of here by August’ kinda way.

I know… a moment many of you might dream of. A wonderful situation, music in everyone’s ears, the end is in sight, the title in reach, the faith of your professor in you. I should be smiling, jumping, thanking. But my instant reaction was neither. In fact, it was an instant, emotional, and quite distinctive ‘Nooo!’. My professor laughed. I laughed. Then it dawned on me: The end of an era is in sight.

2015 is coming, with it a PhD finale, inevitably (well, nearly) and possibly in less than the time it takes for a pregnancy. I felt like they wanted me to get excited about the fact that they were gonna fire me soon. It’s the end of an era, of my safety zone, of a huge chunk of my life, possibly of my life style. Okay, it will (potentially) also be the end of low income, being ‘only’ a student and the ineligibility to get an Australian home loan. But I have never thought that far, never had my mind on details for a life as a ‘doc’. With PhD completion, 2015 sure also opens up options: To stay as a postdoc, to leave as a postdoc, go into the ‘real’ world, become a stripper / tram driver or simply go travelling. Sounds exciting and new, a bit scary, a bit wonderful – and at this moment totally unpredictable. Let’s just dive into it. Bring on 2015!

 

 

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